Holidays r officially over..it's back to college on Monday. It's hard to believe I've been at Help for a year already. Friday was registration for the new sem and results for last sem's finals came out..and I did real badly. Why does everythin hav 2 screw up at once? When one thing goes wrong...everything else seems to go wrong as well. These past few days have been messy..one bad thing after another has been happening...it just proves my theory that good things never last. When your life is going real good and you're having fun and you think that finally, things are going your way, that means something is just around the corner that's gonna bite you in the ass. Also, never ask yourself "can things get any more worse?" Cause then the universe will just go all out to show you..YES THEY CAN INDEED! Talking frm experience here. Anyway...what's done is done right? I can't go back in time and re-do my papers..luckily my parents, although they were quite disappointed at first, have cooled down...I hate disappointing them but somehow I always do. I just really have to study extra hard and be more serious from now on...
Birthday countdown : 2 days. At the rate things are going, there probably won't be much to celebrate. Oh well. Thank god I have my wonderful friends and family and my puppy. Gotta be thankful for the things that at the end of the day, matter most. Til next time..
Heys..I've been thinking about alot of stuff lately. One of it being friendship. It really is sad how you grow apart from the friends you've known since you were a little kid, friends who you shared so many school experiences with, friends who were there during all the shit you did when you were younger, friends who you used to chat on the phone and ICQ [rmbr that?] all night long...of course, it's nobody's fault, people just grow apart and lose touch, but it's just sad. And it's also really screwed up when you lose friends because they betrayed you or took your friendship for granted, cause then the trust is broken and you can't see yourself being close to that friend anymore, or in some cases, even ever talking to that friend again. Another thing that sucks is when you have a really messy break-up with somebody and you lose that friendship as well, cause sometimes you could have been really really great friends with that person but because you decided to be in a relationship, it ruined all that. I really miss the friends I've lost along the way, whether it's because they've betrayed me, or grew apart, or simply lost touch, but I do and always will cherish all the memories.
And as I make new friends, people who come into my life and touch my heart, people I can get along with better than the people I used to be close to but hav grown apart, I know I will cherish the new memories I make with them and maybe we will grow apart someday too, but for now I'll just enjoy it. Cause friendship is really something I treasure, I see now how truly valuable and fragile and easily broken it is. I'm not the perfect friend either, there might have been times where I've let down my friends or took them for granted, and I'm sorry for that.
I know it's not Friendship Day or anything, but whichever of my friends who read my blog, just wanna take this opportunity to say I love you guys..you know who you are. Adios for now. Sorry to whoever read this and felt like killing themselves because of the pure senti-ness. Hahaha. :)
Hello again..I had a great weekend. On Friday, I was feelin pretty sick but I was determind not to let it bring me down so I went out and watched Poseidon with E [spozed 2 watch the Da Vinci Code but it was sold out cos we went kinda late] which was basically just one of the shittiest movies ever made. Saturday afternoon, a relative came over, one I've never met. She's a fortune-teller palm-reader person and it was so damn freaky cause everything she said about my personality and the stuff that has happened to me, was so damn accurate. I know alot of ppl dont believe in these things, but I just can't see how she could be a fake. It was uncanny. When she told me about my future, which I will not disclose [some things have 2 b personal ya noe] it gave me a lil hope, even though I know I really shouldn't believe too much in these things. One weird thing she said was that I would make a very successful lawyer if I entered the field. Me? A lawyer? Okay, there was a brief time in my life when I was watchin alot of Ally McBeal when I wanted to be a lawyer but apart from that I don't have much interest in law.
Anyway. On Sat nite went to Karma with E, Izzy, Tasha, Dennis and the whole gang and it was a whole lot of fun, enjoyed myself to the max. I'm so glad I went, cause initially I wasn't planning to cause of my sickness and cause my parents are not too happy about me going out so much these past few weeks, plus I wasn't so sure who was going. But in the end I thought, what the hell, college is starting soon and when Tasha told me the whole KPG clan was going, I knew I didn't wanna miss it. Karma is a nice place, you don't have to shout to talk 2 people and it's ladies nite til 12 and the free drinks aren't watered down. Guess wat, I found out that alcohol really can cure the flu cause I went there feelin quite shitty and phleghmy and all that, and by the end of the night I felt so much better except of course I lost my voice so now I sound like a guy. Sunday I just chilled at home.
Tmr finally I'll be seein Heather, my bestest friend, I miss her so much. When I see her going thru this difficult time in her life, I feel so helpless cause I want to help her and do something but I know there's nothing I can do. Except let her noe I'm there for her, which I am, always. She's so strong, and she really shouldn't be living this kind of life at the mere age of 19, but I know and I really believe that everything happens for a reason, and even if she has lost her faith, I will believe in it for her and pray that things will get better. Cos again, I stress that bad things happen to good people for a reason. Someone once told me that God only gives difficult challenges to people who he knows has the strength to overcome them and somehow I believe that it's true. Life is just so hard sometimes, even harder for some, but what else can we do but to just go through the motions...?
Okay I'm beginning to depress myself. I shall stop now. Birthday countdown : 8 days!
Here r some pics frm Karma. Ciaoz for now....
me and my bro, chris felix the rocker!
brotherhood for life...E, dennis, izzy
me and tasha,looking gorgeous as usual...[she, not me! ;)]
Still bumming, one more week left til college starts again. I hate how time flies when you're havin fun. Been hanging out alot with E and his friends lately. They're a fun bunch. KPG clan...hahaha. Last weekend I hung out with E, Dennis & Tasha at B'sar and it was fun even though the B'sar crowd was even dodgier than usual. Yesterday I went to Genting for a day trip with Tasha n some of her frens. Altho it rained and we couldn't go to the outdoor theme park, we still went on one of the rides, the Flying Coaster which was awesome altho I was shit scared at first because I am an absolute chicken when it comes to rollercoasters. Hehehe. Sham has not been around so I haven't seen her and Venil in a week plus and I'm really missing 'em. Heather has moved to her aunty's house in Mayang so I'll be seein her even less. Well when college starts again [arrrgh] it'll be back to normal I suppose.
Unfortunately I think I'm sick right now. Must have caught the damn flu bug. Well I'm determined not to let this ruin the last week of my holiday. I'm not gonna rest in bed like some pathetic weakling. I'm not gonna stay at home when I could be out. Muahahaha.
American Idol really sucks this season. Once again they have let me down. What is wrong with Americans? How could Chris Daughtry not even make it to the top 3? It's so obvious he has the best voice and that he's the most talented. He also has the personality. I really thought he would win. What is so great about that Taylor Hicks [who is tipped 2 win] anyway? He seems to me like he has a few screws loose,and hey, I'm all for people who make the effort to be different from everybody else but while I respect that, he just doesnt seem to me like the has the talent to be the next American Idol. Not compared to Chris Daughtry and Mandisa anyway. I don't have much against Catherine McPhee's talent, cause she is an amazing singer and she's versatile and gorgeous, but she seems quite full of herself these past few weeks. But I would prefer her to win rather than Taylor Hicks, of course.
It's Sale time! That means...new college wardrobe. If I can just convince my parents that I need new clothes, that is. Heh heh heh. No I'm not some bimbo who has to go shopping every weekend. I hardly ever go shopping. But once in a while, that girly side of me comes out and it's retail therapy all the way.
Okay I would like to comment on a previous blog entry of mine...I mentioned that when I was goin thru a difficult time recently I wouldn't have made it thru without my friends. Well I didn't mention someone else who also helped me a lot..and who has been there for me well, my whole life basically. My sister..Anusha..I'm sorry I didn't mention you..Now I have ok, so stop makin noise about it. My sis is well the best sister a person could ask for. Sometimes yeah we don't get along but I know at the end of the day that she is one of the few ppl in this world I can truly rely on to help me whenever I need it [altho she does grumble quite a bit] and maybe I have taken that for granted so I'm sorry Sis...I love you. Ok enough sappy crap!!
That's it for now...will update after the weekend. Now I will go and drink water and try everything I can to make myself better. Adios!
Still on holiday...so quickly a week has passed, three weeks left til I have to go back to college and try to push the rest of the memories out of my head and start over. So far I think I'm doing good. Why is life so twisted? When you're in a dry spell, and you've been single for like months and months, there just isn't anyone around even worth the time. But then when you've just ended something really messy and fucked-up, someone comes along who you think you could really like, but of course you're just not ready and it's bad timing. Arrgh! Life's a bitch!
On Saturday night went to Ol'Skool, watch Project8 play, they're pretty damn awesome! It was my first time watchin 'em, and I enjoyed the performance so much, and after it was over they told me it was actually one of their not-so-good performances, and I was like, HUH? I can't wait to see one of their best performances, it must totally rawk! :)
My birthday is in exactly 22 days, part of me just didnt feel like celebrating it cause the plans I had in mind were just crushed, and was feelin kind of cynical about life and was wondering what the hell is the big deal about birthdays. Then Sham came up with the idea of havin something small, something chilled-out like a BBQ, with just people close 2 my heart and the old me, which I've dearly missed but never realized, really liked the idea and so I'm back to full-on party-planning mode. It feels good to be returning to the Old Sharuna again, the one who didn't care what anyone else thought and felt good about herself and the decisions she makes. Okay, I think I'll stop referring to myself as the 3rd person now.
Ola..I cut my hair yesterday..it's still long but I have a fringe now! After what, 10 yrs? Finally I did somethin with my boring hair..I'm still gettin used 2 the look but I like it...it's somethin different! I'm plannin to highlight my hair as well, in fact I was gonna do it yesterday as well but I decided to wait..I'm torn between light brown, red and blonde. Everybody seems to have their own different opinions about what colour I should highlight my hair when I ask them, I think the key is to just go nuts and do something wild without asking anyone's opinion first. Hehehehe.
Last night I went to Bangsar with Sham, Prabata and Sheralynn..the original plan was to go 2 Zouk but then we just didn't feel up to it, besides I'm still boycotting Zouk thanks to all the shit that has happened to me there, so we ended up at Castle. I had such a great time with my girls, it was so much fun. It's been awhile since I just had a girly night, you know, tryin on each other's clothes, doin each other's hair, laughing and making stupid jokes, dancing our hearts out and just being crazy.
After Castle we came back to Sher's place and Sham and Sher went to sleep but I couldn't cause I had to go home at 7 something cause of some 'family obligation' and a kindred soul came all the way from KPG to keep me company. I tell you there are so few genuinely nice guys in this world, and you're one of them E! On the way back home this morning I started thinking about what great friends I have and how blessed I am to have them in my life. I pushed them aside before for someone who thought they weren't good enough for me, now I know that that someone is the one who is actually not good enough for me, how sad that it took me so long to realize that.
Anyway now I'm feelin so stoned cause I only had a few hrs of sleep, yawn. Got an interesting weekend lined up, update you'll soon! Ciaoz...
Hey...I know my blog hasnt been updated in a while. Well too much shit has been happening that I didn't want to blog about, but anyway the shit is over so here I am.
My 3rd semester at HELP has ended, halleujah it's holidays now. The term ended on a royally fucked-up note, I truly learnt the meaning of pain and betrayal and heartbreak and what it's like to be so low in your life that you don't think you can ever get up, but I think I'm better now. People are gonna come and walk all over you treating you like trash, and friends you've known since you were a child are gonna backstab you in the worst of ways but what to do, the world is full of jerks and ho's. I wasted so much time of my life wishing for something and doing everything I could to make it happen only to watch it fall to pieces and now I so regret being so damn stupid. But I guess what doesn't break you can only make you stronger.
Enough of that. On Saturday I went to Semenyih. Where, you ask? It's this place out of the city near Seremban where Sham stays, and I went to stay with her for a few days just to get away from everything, and I had such a great time. She has 12 dogs! She made me eat (she's such a freakin awesome cook), which I did, ALOT, and we went to this Broga (or is it Borga) place where I tried fox meat and felt instantly guilty, and where there was this gorgeous Buddhist temple. I also went to her cousin's wedding. She's such an awesome friend, and she and Venil have helped me thru my difficult times so much that I don't think I could ever begin to repay them. Honestly the one thing I have learnt lately is that you only know how your true friends are when you're in trouble or at a low point in your life...
I can't believe I didn't blog about the one of the few joys in my life...my puppy Princess Maya. She's the best thing that has happened to me in a long time and I love her to bits. Since I was a young child I've been begging and pleading and crying for a pet but my mom never caved, I've tried to bring in stray kittens and puppies but I always had to give them back. Now finally, we had this one practically forced upon us (thank you Sumu) and my mom was apprehensive at first but now she's fallen in love with her just like everyone else has, I tell you, my mom is so full on suprises.
So I intend to make these holidays somethin to remember, cause I'm just so freakin sick of moping about and feeling sorry for myself and my pathetic life, and of being so depressed and so angry at the world, and I started it right by havin an awesome time at Bangsar on Friday night with Sham, Venil and Chuck's friends followed by a rejuvenating trip to Semenyih.
"It's unbelievable but I believed you It's unforgivable but I forgave you Insane what love can do That keeps me coming back to you You're irreplaceable but I'll replace you Now I'm standing on my own Alone..." - Kaci Brown
